Before getting married, it is a huge responsibility to make sure you choose not only the person who will make a good spouse but a good parent too. The upbringing of children will not be an easy task if you are not mentally and psychologically prepared for it, which will make you ask questions, am I going to make a good role model to my kids? Do I have the ability to communicate and transmit knowledge/values to them?
Here are 4 things you need to prioritize to raise good children and develop a healthy parent/child relationship:
- Treat your kids like adults
It’s a common mistake how parents think that treating kids according to their age is logical to them and bearable to their kid, but when the goal is to raise a confident, mature, and well-educated individual by the age of 18, we need to get in mind that kids are compared to sponges, they are way smarter and can take in more than we think which is why we should put this fact into use by:
- Challenging your kids and engaging them in tasks/responsibilities bigger than their age to become self-reliant and build their confidence with time.
- Encouraging them to constantly read/learn about different things to enrich their minds, offering them to teach you and discuss them with you.
- Not limiting or underestimating their potentials or intellectual abilities, you can always put their mental/physical abilities to test and help them get smarter/stronger.
- Have quality time with your spouse and children
Whether it’s the father/mother working or both, they need to sit consistently for some time to reflect on their feelings, decisions, or problems. The child has to take part in it starting from a younger age to be able to speak up and give opinions or even suggest solutions, even though their solutions may not be taken seriously since the child is too small, but the purpose is to involve them in your lives, interact with them more, keep them active and give them a sense of belonging.
Quality time with family includes any activity that keeps you close to each other and implants the value of family in your kids.
- Value your child/Be your child’s biggest supporter
It’s natural for the child to look at their parents as role models. As a result, they will always turn to them for constant praise and validation. What you need to consider is to:
- Appreciate any work from them big or small
- Give cheerful/positive feedback
- Ask for their opinion on their work when they try to ask for yours so they can stand for themselves/their beliefs and only reach out to you for advice.
- Teach your kid to never fear to fail but to always keep trying their best.
- Get your child to confide in you
Creating a close relationship with your child at a very young age will spare you a lot of communication difficulties as they grow up. You will have to:
- Be a good listener
- Show compassion and sympathy
- Get them to trust you so they can open up to you for more
- Be a friend to your children before they turn to others
The most important thing when it comes to parenting is to never raise your kids the way you have been raised, the world is constantly changing and you will soon realize you are preparing them for a world that no longer exists. Keeping up with the times is as essential as acquiring all the qualities mentioned above.